Its Not A Fasion Statement Its A Death Wish
by psychodramabeautyfish
Summary: Why can't vampires join in with the fashions of the 1960s? decides Kurda. some KurdaGavner slash. and credit to Gunnergirl for the idea!


WARNING: Gavner/Kurda slash.

Disclaimer: Gavner not mine. Kurda not mine. Everyone else not mine either.

I'm just borrowing them for a while ;)

It's Not A Fashion Statement It's A Death Wish

"What on earth does he think he looks like?" Vanez muttered in Gavner's ear as Kurda came sauntering towards them.

"I have no idea…" Gavner whispered back.

"He looks like an idiot."

"Well he obviously doesn't think so…"

They were sitting in the Hall of Osca Velm - Gavner had arrived barely an hour before and Vanez had come to greet some old friends - when Kurda had suddenly appeared, cheery as ever, escorted by a bemused looking guard.

"Evening gentlemen." Cooed Kurda, swooping down to sit beside Gavner. "Good trip?"

The eyes of every vampire in the hall followed Kurda's every move like a bunch of hungry hawks.

"Hello Kurda. You look… interesting." Vanez finished lamely, his one eye beginning to hurt from the swirl of colour that had just been presented to him.

"Oh really?" said Kurda breezily, delicately picking the sparkly, star-shaped sunglasses off his head to run a hand through his shoulder-length blonde hair.

"Hello Gavner, haven't seen you for a while!"

Gavner looked mortified at being addressed by the blonde General, and had obviously planned to pretend not to know him.

Kurda was wearing bright yellow flared trousers, had acquired some high-heeled boots from somewhere, a hideously patterned shirt with the collar turned up, several hundred strings of beads around his neck, and star-shaped sunglasses covered with sequins. He was also carrying a rucksack covered with brightly coloured badges.

"Kurda." He grunted, trying to move his mouth as little as possible.

"You probably had a better trip here then I did I can tell you, every tiny thing that could go wrong did! Snow, hail, abominable snowmen… Which reminds me!" He pulled off his rucksack and began to rummage in it. Up close Gavner could see that the badges said things like 'Support Greenpeace' and 'Save the Whales'.

"Er Kurda?" interrupted Vanez.

"Mmm?" replied Kurda vaguely, bringing his head back out of his bag.

"What exactly… What the Hell are you wearing?" Said Vanez, deciding there was no room for tact.

Kurda's smile faded and he seemed to grow smaller. "What's wrong with it?"

"You look like an idiot."

Kurda's mouth trembled a little and he turned the puppy eyes onto Gavner.

"I… Er…" Gavner started, feeling the eyes of every other vampire in the hall lock onto him. "Yes Kurda you look stupid."

Kurda glared at him, and then jumped up onto the table.

"Just so all you out-of-touch people know!" he announced proudly, "Outside this mountain, I, am a fashion victim! This is cool! It's what everyone's wearing so keep up with the times people! It's 1960 for crying out loud!"

He then sauntered up and down the table a few times, much to the delight of the watching vampires (who let loose a few catcalls and whistles), and then sat back down next to Gavner again, sulkily grabbing some food and beginning to eat.

Kurda trailed into the Hall of Princes behind Gavner. They always reported to the Princes together, and he knew that if the others had been snide about how he looked then the Princes would be merciless, but he still held his head high.

Mika took one look at the pair, and started to snigger behind his long dark hair. Kurda took no hesitation in glaring at him; Mika was one of the Princes he was_ not_ afraid of.

Paris raised an eyebrow in bemusement, and Vancha whistled suggestively, having a great laugh at Kurda's expense.

Kurda stood stiffly, arms folded.

_If we were __out of this mountain… _ he thought angrily. Then he began to mentally fit each Prince into a stereotype, which made him feel miles better at some of the images his brain came up with.

They both bowed before the Princes, Kurda having to hold his sunglasses in place as he did so.

"Gavner." Said Paris in greeting. "Kurda."

They straightened up. Mika snickered.

_You just wait you low-life s__cum-sucking…_ Gavner interrupted Kurda's silent montage as he began his report.

As Kurda had best part of nothing to report on, he was only here to show the Princes he had arrived, so he spent the next hour sat in his chair fidgeting uncomfortably.

Later Kurda was still sulking. He hadn't objected when Gavner had asked for them to be placed together, they nearly always were, but he hadn't said anything else either.

"Kurda, everyone was watching." Pleaded Gavner desperately.

They were lying together but Kurda still hadn't said a single word, which was sending signals to Gavner about how hurt he must've been.

"So?" he muttered angrily.

Gavner didn't reply.

Kurda pulled away a little to look at him, he'd pulled a dark coloured jumper over his bright outfit to keep warm, but the sunglasses were still obviously perched on his head as a last stand of defiance.

Gavner's mouth dried up once confronted by that piercing stare and he looked away guiltily.

"Everyone was watching, so go and stick up for me why don't you?" hissed Kurda.

"Kurda I'm sorry!"

"And then you've still got the _nerve_ to ask me to stay with you another 5 years!"

Gavner groaned inwardly, that had been a mistake and he'd known the second he'd said it that he should've chosen a better moment.

"Thanks a bunch Gavner, you really put it in prospective for me!"

"Kurda I said I'm sorry!" shouted Gavner, exasperated.

Kurda flinched away from the noise, hissing through his teeth.

"I'm sorry…" muttered Gavner again. "Yes I should have stood up for you."

Kurda glared for a few more moments, before his face relaxed and he snuggled back up to the other General, rubbing his hands over his chest.

"I don't really care…" he murmured.

"Still," replied Gavner, wrapping his arms around the smaller man, carding his fingers through the blonde hair. "You're right, I shouldn't've said that to you in front of everyone and I'm sorry I did. Forgive me?"

Kurda sighed and then nodded wearily.

Gavner smiled in relief, tipping Kurda's head up to kiss him on the lips.

Kurda kissed him back, opening his mouth to let Gavner's tongue brush his own.

He couldn't be bothered to be angry any longer, he could never stay angry for long anyway, regardless who it was he was angry with. And he'd missed Gavner so much that he didn't want to stay being angry, they only had a few weeks until council ended, so he didn't want to waste that time over something that trivial.

The blonde closed his eyes and let himself be kissed.

"I love you…" He mumbled when they pulled back for air.

"Shut up." Growled Gavner, tugging Kurda's jumper up over his head.

Kurda smacked him lightly on the side of the head. "What are you 15? You can't have people saying they love you?"

Gavner didn't bother to answer, just groaned as the slender vampire pushed him onto his back and straddled his hips, kissing him eagerly. While their mouths were engaged in a battle for dominance, Gavner began unbuttoning Kurda's floral shirt, yanking viciously at them when they refused to come undone.

"I don't know about the shirt," said Gavner, dumping the shirt on the floor and sliding his large hands down Kurda's back and coming to rest on his behind. "But you should definitely wear these jeans more often."

"Flares." Corrected Kurda, before slipping his own slender fingers under Gavner's t-shirt, scratching the skin with his fingernails, and pulling it off. He attacked his lover's bare chest with kisses, nipping the skin gently, leaving a trail of red marks.

"C'mon Gavner!" Kurda shrieked, "You have to see this!"

"I'm coming I'm coming…" grumbled Gavner, following Kurda down the streetlamp lit road, wondering why he'd agreed to accompany the blonde on this trip.

Now that they were out of the mountain, Gavner could see that Kurda was right, he was a fashion victim.

Nearly everyone aged about 15 up to maybe late twenties was dressed in a similar fashion to the blonde general; flared trousers, long hair, floral shirts… it was doing Gavner's head in!

"Look!" grinned Kurda, pointing across the street.

The larger man looked to where Kurda was pointing, and froze.

"Oh please no…" he croaked.

There was a brightly coloured hippie van badly parked on the curb. It was covered in flowers and bubble writing that said things like 'Peace out'.

It was a nightmare.

And Kurda was fishing the keys out of his backpack.


End file.
